![]() |
| Source |
So here I am at 26 years old… I hadn’t ever really spent the night at a guys house til recent years, took my first trip with a guy at like 20 or 21, but I never thought I’d live with a guy. Well times change and people change I suppose. I’m certainly not getting any younger and I’m spending 3 months with my beau to complete an externship and to see what’s really up. He and I both know what the deal is so I’m not concerned about others’ finger swagging, mouth spitting scolding. Those same people all lived with their mates before marriage, some who you think are married are actually “common-law marriage”, many were doing the do, and most of them all had babies pre-marriage. It’s 2012, stop centering your lives around the belief systems of everyone else. Know yourself and your God and what standards He will hold you up to. All of the other stuff only complicates things. Other people’s judgment and condemnation isn’t right anyway. I guess the fact of the matter is that if you even have to care about what other people think then maybe you shouldn’t be doing what you are doing, whether it’s because it’s wrong or because you aren’t mature enough for the decision you are making. I find that listening to what other people have to say often pushes people who are thinking of or already “shacking” into marriage. I’m not marrying anyone just because people say I should. I understand that the Bible states that it’s better to marry than to burn but again, if the sexual aspect of the relationship is non-existent (Yeah, I’m still celibate folks) then does that statement really apply? I understand the lust and temptation components that exist in this situation, but I’d rather deal with that rather than marry someone and co-habitate with them without giving it a test run before marriage. Call it what you may but that’s simply just my opinion. With all of that being said, I do not agree with those who live with their significant others for years at a time with no thoughts of marriage or better yet, the girl wants it but the guy isn’t ready. That brings along the age old question, “Why buy the cow when you can have the milk for free?” Let’s not be stupid ladies. You don’t opt to live with someone because you want to make them marry you. If you have to “make” someone do anything then chances are, you don’t need to be with him. I also don’t agree with couples buying real estate with both names on the mortgage when they haven’t finalized whether or not they are getting married. If things don’t work out then you are left with a divorce-like situation where you have to decide who gets what and so forth. I guess my suggestion for most is to just try a 3-4 month test run of living together. You will learn so much more about who you are with in 90 days… far more than you ever could have learned in those 90 hours or so when you spend the weekend over.

Leave a comment